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Author Topic: What made you smile?  (Read 1943386 times)
Nellie
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« Reply #720 on: May 31, 2009, 05:18:02 PM »

I really don't like telephones! I would much rather respond to someone when I have time or when it's convenient to me. Most people seem to call me when I'm putting the kids in the bath or to bed or I am eating.
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Pedro
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« Reply #721 on: May 31, 2009, 06:49:00 PM »

I really don't like telephones! I would much rather respond to someone when I have time or when it's convenient to me. Most people seem to call me when I'm putting the kids in the bath or to bed or I am eating.
Do you know, for a moment, I thought you meant you don't do all those things at the same time!
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Nellie
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« Reply #722 on: May 31, 2009, 08:49:44 PM »

I really don't like telephones! I would much rather respond to someone when I have time or when it's convenient to me. Most people seem to call me when I'm putting the kids in the bath or to bed or I am eating.
Do you know, for a moment, I thought you meant you don't do all those things at the same time!
Hah! Don't even go there Roll Eyes
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Nellie
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« Reply #723 on: June 01, 2009, 08:21:49 PM »

2 fledgling robins in the garden, flapping away.
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hoboslobo
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« Reply #724 on: June 03, 2009, 09:23:25 PM »

Ding-Dong! The Witch Is Dead.


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"Apparently Neil Armstrong used to tell unfunny jokes about the Moon and follow them up with "Ah, I guess you had to be there."
Simon
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« Reply #725 on: June 03, 2009, 10:48:22 PM »

Booking my first Archery session in four years.
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Sarah
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« Reply #726 on: June 04, 2009, 12:25:54 PM »

Oooh, very swish!

xx
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Simon
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« Reply #727 on: June 04, 2009, 06:08:59 PM »

Swish....thud!

*sounds of trumpets followed by a mighty laugh, then the sound of horses hooves galloping into the distance*

Ahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!


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Pedro
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« Reply #728 on: June 04, 2009, 07:29:51 PM »

Go on, Simon.....AudioBoo awaits.....unless you don't have an iPhone or suitably equipped iPodTouch...or know anyone with either....
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Simon
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« Reply #729 on: June 04, 2009, 10:08:52 PM »

Listening to Jem's Boos really takes me back to a time when we were both kids making spoof comedy tapes. I think it all stems from the fact that as children, we discovered that Dad had a load of Goon Shows on vinyl which we listened to endlessly (even today, I could quote you almost every line from the Lurgi Strikes Britain episode). From there we graduated to other radio shows like I'm Sorry I have A Clue, Radio Active and On The Hour. All of them understood that if you didn't have any pictures, you could make the sounds do almost anything to create impossible pictures in your own head.

Spike Milligan was a bloody genius.
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Pedro
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« Reply #730 on: June 04, 2009, 10:32:14 PM »

Amen to that!
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Sarah
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« Reply #731 on: June 05, 2009, 01:46:22 PM »

Testify!

xx
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« Reply #732 on: June 05, 2009, 01:56:31 PM »

Going to see Lewis Black on Sunday at the Udderbelly on the South Bank.

He and David Cross are my favourite living US comics, and I will have seen both of them in the space of a year.

Shame it's going to pee down on Sunday.
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Nellie
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« Reply #733 on: June 05, 2009, 02:17:10 PM »

Going to see Lewis Black on Sunday at the Udderbelly on the South Bank.

He and David Cross are my favourite living US comics, and I will have seen both of them in the space of a year.

Shame it's going to pee down on Sunday.
I had a tweet from Bill Bailey who went to this the other day and said it was fab.
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Pedro
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« Reply #734 on: June 07, 2009, 05:30:35 PM »

The late Clement Freud's barometer story.

Quote from: Clement Freud
I was for six years rector of the University of Dundee. As rector, one would chair the court of the University. There was one occasion when a physics student came to us with a complaint. He had, in the course of his final year physics exam been asked a question. He had been asked ‘How would you guage the height of a skyscraper, using a barometer?’

He had answered that he would take the barometer to the top of the skyscraper. He would tie a piece of string to it, and lower it to the ground. He would then measure the elapsed string, add the length of the barometer, and that would be the height of the skyscraper.

He was failed for showing a total ignorance of physics. He appealed to us on the grounds that he had given a correct answer and received no credit for it. And the marks were important to the quality of his degree.

We considered, and then accepted he had a point and so appointed an external examiner to ask the question again. When the examiner met him, he said to the student ‘You’ve had plenty of time to answer it, so come on what is your answer?’

The student said, ‘It isn’t as simple as that. I could of course go to the top of the skyscraper, and drop the barometer. And then with an accurate stop watch record the length of time taken for it to hit the ground and then, bearing in mind the falling speed of the object, I could give you a pretty good idea of what the height of the skycraper is.

Or, and this is I imagine what you had in mind, I could measure the barometric pressure at the top of the building, and then again at the bottom.

But on consideration, what I think I would do, would be to go to the janitor and say to him, “If you tell me the height of this skyscraper, I will give you a barometer.
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